NFA Champion Interview: "Listen, you should earn your foul"

We now bring you an exclusive interview with Arlington Assaulters, conducted by yours truly, the commissioner.

Commissioner: So how does it feel to be the National Foul Association Champion?

Arlington Assaulters: It feels great!!!! Just like normal. Always knew I was a champion.

Commish: You ended the duopoly of Pgastan FC and Rodman'sWeddingDress, anything you want to say? Any advice for Atletico Madrid who are looking to end the duopoly in La Liga?

AA: F*** those guys! I am the best! Those guys are just lucky I didn't come along until now.

Atletico will be fine. Just keep scoring goals and f*** the naysayers.

Commish: The first two years whichever team had Dwight Howard won, the last two years whichever team had DeMarcus Cousins won, you had neither, how did you do it?

AA: Fouling is a team sport.  Draft well and you may end up like me someday.  Hah. Good luck.

Commish: Do you think flopping is an integral part of NFA? It actually encourages fouls for your opponents, giving your competition more points.

AA: Listen,you should earn your foul.  Dwayne Wade drawing the techy versus Lance Stephenson for his second techy and the ejection was disgusting.    And seeing LeBron James flop every day to give out fouls like candy... Some players should be banned.  Hell just take the Heat out of the NFA.  They don't belong.

Commish: As an NFA team owner, would you like to see more contract bonuses for performance fouls?

AA: Hell no!  My team would bankrupt me if this happened.

Commish: Should the league be open to expansion or will that just dilute the fouler pool?

AA: Expansion is fine.  More suckers for me to walk through to get to the NFA trophy.

Commish: Would you be open to expanding rosters (if Yahoo! allows it) to add coaches to rosters in order for teams to get bench techys?

AA: Absolutely.  Bench techys are a whole new source of entertainment for our fans.

Commish: You were first in the league in Fouls, Foul outs, Ejections, and Flagrants, but were only 4th in techys, is this something you want to improve moving forward?

AA: What!!! I AM THE BEST!!! This interview is over!!!

Commish: Any free agent pickups you want to attribute to you winning the title? Who was your 6th man of the year?

AA: No free agent really stands out.  Westbrook had his moments although he spent a lot of time on the bench.  Same with 6th man of the year.  Everyone had a job to do and did it well.

Commish: Who is your team's Most Valuable Fouler (MVF)?

AA: MVF was Lowry.  He had a great season.